My Minute Bio

The magazine I just submitted to required a publication-ready bio be included in the submission, so I threw this together. Hope it does the trick.

Rob Darnell lives in a nice neighborhood. His office window looks out on a lake. He has a cat named Buddy and a dog named Luci. He loves the Detroit Tigers, Lions, Red Wings, Pistons and the Michigan Wolverines. An avid deer hunter, he spends time in a tiny shack from the beginning of October until the end of December. His website is

Forgotten Story

I found an 8,800-word story that I don’t remember writing. I can’t say for sure what it’s about, but a quick skim reveals that it is a crime story.

Think I’ll go ahead and submit it without reading it and see what happens. If it’s published, maybe someday people will come up to me and talk about this character or that and the things they did, and I’ll have to ask them, “Which story is that?”

Butchering My Deer

I have two packages of venison left in my freezer. One is burger and one is steak. I’ve been saving them, but will probably eat them soon. I wish I had more.

I hunt deer every year, from the beginning of October until the end of December. In the last couple years, I’ve seen a lot of deer while in my shack. But I buy only one doe tag and one buck tag a year.

After you get a deer and tag it, you can buy another tag. The tags are $20.00 each. That’s not bad. I would sure like to buy a new tag after harvesting a deer. At $20.00 a tag, I could definitely buy more tags.

The problem is, having a butcher process your deer is expensive. I mean, it’s a reasonable price if you’re just bringing in one or two deer a year. But if you want to bring in more deer and you’re not particularly rich, it’ll hit your wallet pretty hard.

For a while now, I’ve thought to butcher my deer myself. It would save me a lot of money. My brother worked as a butcher and meatcutter for years. He told me that all I’d need is a good knife, a small meat grinder, freezer bags and practice.

Seems simple enough and not very costly. So, this year I’m going to get that stuff together before Archery Season starts on October 1st.  I will probably need my brother’s help until I get the hang of it, but eventually I’ll be doing it myself.

If I do my own butchering, I might be able to harvest enough venison to feed me for a year.

Not the Red Wings too!

Well, shit. I was hoping the Red Wings would give me some relief from this torture and for a good part of the game, it looked like they just might. The Red Wings were leading, the score was 3-2, but then the Bruins scored in the third period.

An overtime was added. Looked like the overtime would end without the tie broken. But, with a couple seconds left on the clock, the Bruins scored again.

Final Score
DET: 3
BOS: 4

Damn, damn, damnity, damn


Jesus Christ, the Pistons kept missing their shots. Seems like every time I turn on a Piston game, this is what I see. The Pistons dragging behind the other team.

Tonight’s game was against the Kings. In the third quarter, the Piston were about ten points behind the Kings, but they brought their score up. At one point in the fourth quarter, the Pistons were three points behind.

The Pistons had plenty of chances to get ahead of the Kings, but they kept missing their shots.

Lately while watching my teams lose, I get so mad that my bitching doesn’t make sense. My words don’t come together in a proper sentence. It’s been like that since the Wolverines lost to the Buckeyes. After the Wolverine-Buckeye game, I watched the Lions blow their first place standing and their Wildcard, and the Wolverines lost the Orange Bowl.

My teams are killing me.