Guess I’ll stew it up tonight

I got a few different things on my mind tonight, so I’ll just mix it all in.

Sometimes people I know seem to analyze me and draw conclusions about me and my life. I know they mean well, but it really irritates me when people do that. I usually respond with fury. But today it occurred to me that I don’t have to get so goddamn mad every time, that there are better ways to respond to things like that.

I’m thinking about the Claire Fisher response. In the first season of Six Feet Under, Claire is having problems dealing with her dad’s death and she’s going down a destructive path, or that’s what her family believes. In one episode, Nate tells Claire that they’re going to get her some help. Without missing a beat, Claire tells Nate, “If you want a project, get a dog.”

Yeah, I think that’s what I’ll start telling people. But don’t count on me being able to pull it off much. I’m, regretfully, prone just blowing up.

I’m pretty open about things that I struggle with. Confidence, anxiety, anger, and number of other things. I got problems. I know this. But what bugs me is when we’re not even talking about anything that I struggle with and out of the blue someone draws a conclusion about some disorder they think I might have or something they think I need to do to make my life happier.

That really gets under my skin. And often their conclusions are way off. When people do that, I feel like I’m being analyzed for a diagnose and it makes me want to hold back when sharing anything with anyone.

But today, while talking to a friend about it, and being angry at the same time, I started thinking that maybe I don’t have to be so mad. I’d like to respond more kindly when people piss me off.

Okay, that out of the way.

My mom’s oldest brother Bobby was visiting from Pennsylvania. I see Bobby once every ten or fifteen years. When I got to mom and dad’s yesterday and walked in the door. Bobby was sitting at the bar (or island?). It was like I was seeing Grandpa Piehl. Bobby looks exactly like Grandpa. And they both have the same name, Robert.

Aunt Barb and cousin Kari were there too. Also, Bobby’s wife, who is also named Barb. I guess you could say I had two Aunt Barbs there. Later, Uncle Jimmy and Aunt Cindy came. Haven’t seen Jimmy and Cindy in a few years, I guess. They came on a motorcycle. I remember when I was a little kid, Uncle Jimmy was the biker in the family. That was a long time ago. I don’t know when he started riding again, but that’s a really nice motorcycle he has.

As usual, I didn’t talk much. But I did enjoy listening to my mom, dad and Uncle Bobby playing acoustic guitars on the back deck. I think my mom and Bobby are the only ones in their very large family who play music.

I saw this questionnaire on Facebook. Thought I’d fill it out.

Prop …. Huh?
Children…. 0
Pets right now…. 2
Surgeries…. Five or six
Tattoos…. 2
Piercings…. 0
Shot a gun…. Yes
Quit a job…. No
Ever been on tv… Yes
Been to an island…. I don’t think so
Flown in a plane…. Yes
Furthest destination.. Florida
Hit by a car.. No
Someone cried over you…Yes
Fallen in love.. Yes
Watched someone die…Yes
Watched someone give birth … No
Rode in an ambulance…I’m not sure
Visited Las Vegas…. No
Been ice skating…If you want to call it that
Rode a horse….. Yes
Almost died….Yes
Been punched…. Yes
Stayed in a hospital…. Yes
Favourite fruit…Oranges, I think
Favourite desert…. Cheesecake
Favourite movie… The Bourne Identity

The Tigers beat the Rockies. 4-3. This dreadful season won’t last much longer. Let’s just see how many more games the Tigers can win this year.

Wish I had beer.

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